AUTHOR: Brad DATE: 12/27/2002 01:51:00 AM ----- BODY: We Are Family

Man, this daily blogging thing sure hasn't been too exciting lately. I appologize to those of you that have checked here the past few days. I was busy with Christmas and all. Actually, that really isn't a very good excuse because I've been pretty bored out of my mind lately. Most of my friends are out of town back at home and, since I don't have schoolwork to occupy my time and it isn't a very good time to job search during the holidays, I've had plenty of time to spew forth some thoughts onto a computer screen. Don't worry, it's not that I am lacking ideas. If anything I have too many thoughts going on in my head that I can't narrow down a concrete thing to write about. The holidays are an interesting time to me. It's a time when families are supposed to be together. Actually, it's one of the few times of the year when it is the societal norm to set aside a night or two to enjoy the company of family. I, being one of the many children in the country that have been the unfortunate products of divorce, have never felt completely at home with my family. This is probably due to the fact that when I'm staying with my dad my sister and I feel like we are the visitors instead of actual members of the family. These people live in small town podunk Iowa and gossip about who's kids in the city are doing what, what street signs have been added nearby, or how long it takes them to drive to neighboring cities from their respective locations. It's sad but true. My sister and I just sit there making wisecracks to each other in an attempt to conjure up some sort of amusement from the situation. I don't believe I am alone with these awkward family situations. As a matter of fact, I believe they are more common than not. It's interesting to me to think that my dad's relatives and my mom's relatives were actually friends at some point. That is, until the common link that they shared in my parent's marriage faltered. After that, their attitudes towards each other became like that of the Capulets and Montagues. It didn't matter how well they got along, it was what ancestors they happened to share that ultimately decided their opinions of one another. Rather petty if you ask me. I've experienced this firsthand with former stepbrothers/sisters formed through my mother's previous marriages. Once the knot becomes untied, so does their friendship. It this through these experiences that I firmly places my ideals in relationships, whether they be with family or friends. The true people who deserve your gifts of generousity are not just those who merely share a name with you by coincidence. They are those who will be there for you regardless of anything. It is they whom I have always wished to spend my time with during the holidays. Maybe it's time more emphasis is placed on loving people who love you back...not just because they have to. -------- AUTHOR: Brad DATE: 12/22/2002 03:40:00 PM ----- BODY: Pee-Wee Does It Again

I don't know how many people know this, but I just found out something pretty disturbing last night. Paul Reubens (aka the beloved Pee-Wee Herman) was arrested once again this past month for child pornography. There was a couple a new Pee-Wee movies slated for production soon, so I was really hoping to see a comeback from the guy. It definately bums me out. The masterbating in the porn theater to naked girls I could look past, but getting excited over little kids is just plain wrong...especially since he had a kids show. Maybe he should have focused his efforts from restarting his acting career to being a Catholic priest. Then he could indulge on his kiddie fantasies and only suffer a slight slap on the wrist if he got caught. Starting that profession would almost garauntee he wouldn't have to suffer prison time like everyone else. -------- AUTHOR: Brad DATE: 12/22/2002 02:06:00 AM ----- BODY: A Role Reversal Of Sorts

I just got home from hanging out with one of my best friends from high school before he leaves tomorrow morning on a plane to Thailand to visit his parents for Christmas. Many people I know dread going home because they either don't have anyone to hang out with or they don't care to be around people that are back home. As for me, I have been blessed with some great friends that have remained close throughout a period when most people start to drift apart. It is my belief that the best friends you can have are those you can have a great time with even when you aren't doing anything at all. That is completely true of my friends here and for that I will be forever grateful. Disclaimer: this is a website devoted to whatever is on my mind. It may be funny, it may be thought-provoking, it may be offensive, and it may make you realize I'm someone you never want to associate yourself with again. Regardless, please keep this in mind when you read the following. You have been warned. I believe I caught my mom making out tonight. Actually, as I run the scene through my head, I'm positive I interrupted a session of tonsil hockey with her newest boyfriend whom she won't refer to as her boyfriend quite yet. I came back to retrieve a DVD to watch with my above-mentioned friend and they were sitting on the couch "cuddling". As I opened the front door, they both jumped apart quick and my mother's mouth was pretty red. They, of course, played it off like they were just talking. I realize most people would be repulsed to see such a thing, but it's something that I find pretty entertaining in a way. See, I've lived under a roof with three of my mother's husbands throughout my lifetime. I guess I've become immune to being disgusted at the thought of my mom with someone else. It was funny because it reminded me of some teenage couple getting caught by their parents. Only this time it was the kid catching the parent in the act. I always wondered if parents were clueless when their kids would go downstairs and "watch a movie" with whomever they were dating or if they knew what "watching a movie" meant and just didn't want to confront the issue. After tonight, I think it's safe to say that they do know what goes on and they just don't want to think about it. I won't bring it up to my mom. I know for sure she won't bring it up with me. I just wonder if I'll have the willpower to bit my lip in the future when I know full well my kids are using theirs. -------- AUTHOR: Brad DATE: 12/21/2002 05:04:00 PM ----- BODY: Presenting An Image Of Success At All Times...

There is a friend of mine, or should I say ex-friend, that just recently moved away to continue her career. I met her while working at my internship this summer/early fall, and we immediately got along because she had been very active with her school's Dance Marathon at the University of Indiana. Unfortunately, the subject of DM was about the only thing we had in common, and her mentality soon began to drive me nuts. This person was obsessed with her career and making money. She would always tell me that she probably would never get married because relationships would only interefere with her working life. We had a lot of discussions that sometimes ended up being rather heated about the right way to live you life. Material possessions are just not that extremely important to me. I mean, I would like a nice house someday, nice tv, etc., but I can't imagine abandoning friendships and sacrificing relationships to get those things. Afterall, what good is it to end up with the fanciest gravestone if you don't have anyone to come and visit you when you die? Her positon she held was only a 5 month term and she ended up getting a job with Purdue, I believe. About a month ago she infomed me that she hated it in Iowa because she fell in love with a guy here that dumped her and broke her heart. I felt bad for her when the whole situation happened, but the girl fails to move on from it. To make a long story short, she told me that when she moves away she doesn't even think she'd want to keep in touch with me because she wants to sever all ties she's made during her tenure here...all because she dated some person who hurt her. This mentality just blows my mind. I'm the type of person who strives for meaningful interactions among individuals and I find it pointless to continue putting time and effort into something that won't last. I guess I'm stubborn that way. It even bothers me when I pass someone on campus and they say "Hey, how are you?" and then keep on walking. Empty questions like that completely lack any form of sincerity. Visitors from other countries marvel at us Americans for how we are so impersonal like that. Anyway, she moved away last week and I hadn't talked to her for a month leading up to it because I found it pointless to continue a "friendship" that had a dead end on it. I do wish her the best, though, but I can't help but hope something comes along to shift her materialistic mentality. -------- AUTHOR: Brad DATE: 12/19/2002 01:34:00 AM ----- BODY: Something To Ponder

In roughly 27 hours my last fall semester as an Iowa Stater will be just a memory. It's very scary to think about. For break I will be heading home to Bettendorf with brief visits to the bustling metropolis of Sac City and, of course, Ames. This Christmas should be interesting because my grandparents have been residing in our home due to the tragedy that my grandmother is dying of brain cancer and only has a couple months left to live. It will, no doubt, be a bittersweet celebration of enjoying our limited time with her yet knowing it will be the last holiday we will spend together. The situation got me thinking about the ironies of my both my grandmother's deaths. My dad's mom died of cancer of her esophegus. It was a horrible sickness, obviously. It's so strange to me that both of my grandmothers will die totally opposite deaths from the same killer of cancer. My dad's mom suffered a painful death that left her breathing out her neck and unable to eat food for almost half a year. She either talked through a machine that felt the vibrations in her voice box and projected it or she would scribble down anything she had to say on one of those static pads that you'd lift up the top sheet and all of what you'd write would erase. She was in terrible pain, but she consciously knew everyone and everything until the day she died. My mom's mom, on the other hand, will die totally free from pain but clueless to the world around her. She won't know the names of her own children or recognize the loving face of the man she's been married to for almost 70 years. She won't even know what end of a knife to hold during a meal. This has gotten me thinking. If, in fact, cancer is genetic, there's a pretty good chance I'll be suffering from it in some shape or form. So what would I choose? A painful death in which I'd be aware of everything or a painless death where I wouldn't understand a thing? I believe I'd go with the former if I had a choice. I would, without question, endure the most painful of illnesses so that everyone I know and love knew that I thought of them until the day I died. If you had a choice, what would you choose? I think you can tell a lot about a person by how they answer that question. Granted, it's a rather morbid thought but it's something to ponder, nevertheless. -------- AUTHOR: Brad DATE: 12/17/2002 11:19:00 PM ----- BODY: Humorous Study Break Anyone?

Yes, yes, I know it's finals week and everyone is trying to cram every last tidbit of information into their brains, but a friend showed me this site and I found it quite amusing. It's an Emo video game and it pokes fun of some bands. It's good to take a break in the midst of extreme stress. Afterall, if you repress your fun for extended periods of time you could end up like this guy. Enjoy. -------- AUTHOR: Brad DATE: 12/17/2002 10:56:00 AM ----- BODY: Music Industry Insight

I have often been refered to as a music snob among my circle of friends. This is probably because of my criticism towards a lot of the music that is currently polluting the mainstream airwaves. I research bands to find what I like, and I guess that's the glory of the internet and mp3s. In high school, it was a lot more difficult to seek out talented bands or songwriters because I didn't have a clue about Napster until my first semester in college. Once I found out about it, though, I became obsessed with the world of music. I admit that I am the first person to go off ranting about the state of music. It's amazing how little the lyrics matter. It's so stupid to see "music stars" sing songs about how you should take off your clothes because it's hot in the room or to see them displaying their wealth for being a no talent clown to their audience. Don't they realize that their career has no longevity? That's the sad thing about the state of pop culture right now. It doesn't matter what they're singing about as long as they look good or they have some little gimmick that sets them apart from others like wearing black dress clothes with a white tie. Don't believe me? Then why is TRL so huge and the biggest source of music for most people? Because people no longer really listen to the music. They like to see what the videos are like and then form an opinion based upon what they see. The White Stripes, however, are deserving of their attention despite the fact that they dress so trendy. Which leads me to another point..... The industry is so concerned with finding the next big thing that they lose sight of talented acts in the business. Again, The White Stripes are a good example. The media is portraying them as being a "new band". Where were they years ago when the band released their first 2 albums? I know I was listening to them at the time. Oh yeah, that's right, the big thing then was boy bands. Pheew! It's a good thing the 15 minutes of fame for boy bands are up and the music people started looking to whom they could cast their next 15 minutes of fame. It's funny how Chevelle is starting to be recognized, as well. This is because they finally were landed a spot on Ozzfest. Now they are being tauted as a good new band. New? I listened to Chevelle in high school. Until people start seeking out talent instead of finding new genres of music to market to the masses, I will always be critical. But here's my take on it all: If you are one of those people who allows yourself to be force-fed the garbage broadcast to you via MTV and commercial radio, then you obviously don't deserve to listen to the great music that is out there. Those that care enough about music are those that spend time finding them. That's why it bothers me when a band I have listened to for a while find their way to the mainstream. It's not because I like them because they're my little secret. I'll always tell my friends who are passionate about music to check out the (fill in the blank) album I've been listening to. It's primarliy because anyone that already cares about music has already listened to them, and I don't want some lazy music fan who relies on TRL to discover new bands to listen to them. They don't deserve it, in my opinion. So that's my rant on music right now. For those of you who are thinking "Gee Brad, I think you're right. How can I start finding out about good music?" Well, I would recommend Pitchfork, Allmusic, CMJ, and NME for starters. Also, every Tuesday is when new music is released so go and check out places for reviews. I usually go to places like Entertainment Weekly or E!. Rolling Stone, Spin, CMJ, etc. are all good magazines, too, even though Rolling Stone has started catering to what's popular (they gave a 4 star review of Justin Timberlake's album right next to only a 3 star review of Pearl Jam's newest) and their covers have started looking more like Maxim than a music magazine. I'll be posting my favorite albums of the year later. -------- AUTHOR: Brad DATE: 12/17/2002 01:12:00 AM ----- BODY: MY FIRST POST

So here it begins...the very first posting on this nifty little site. I don't really have a whole lot to say right now because to get started they make you put something on right away. It's sort of like when someone tells you to say something funny. You just can't do it if the mood isn't there. Well that's about where I'm at. Anyway, this site was basically created due to a seed on inspiration from my friend Andy. My roommate Jon also has a site. I encourage you to check them out. I'll be back with more later. --------